Apocalypse or Apocalipstick?

CIA (California Institute for Abnormalities) could only have come out of the deranged minds of its founders, Carl Crew and Robert Ferguson. Six years in the making, it's a museum of oddities and freak shows long since gone. Crew's motto is "we never subtract, only add," and they don't just mean artifacts. CIA proudly presents a mummified clown and severed arm for all that are brave enough to enter (and that's just in the foyer!). Showcasing specialty shows like "Girlyfreakshow" and the "Dead Puppet Society," it seems fitting that they would become host to Lenora Claire's christening of "Apocalipstick." It's almost impossible to describe and do the dark cabaret justice. Lenora has brought together a truly talented group of artists to strut their stuff under the big top of North Hollywood.

For the grand opening of what Lenora and CIA are hoping will be a monthly event beginning in February, Lenora brought what she calls "outside artists" to a venue suitable for their unique work. Everyone from a transgender Jim Morrison impersonator to the wonderfully full figured burlesque dancer Bella Baretta spent at least a few minutes on CIA's stage.

And they RAWKED!

Starting off the show was Count Smokula, an accordion-playing vampire. He did covers and originals as Lenora danced the night away on a podium behind him. The Count's tongue-in-cheek performance brought the small but very crowded club to a standstill (the
cool fez hat didn't hurt either). Not bad for a 496 year old vamp.

Several entertaining acts followed, such as the fire eating/glass walking (and slithering) Miss Satanica, but the highlights of Apocolipstick belonged to Nora Keyes, David Lovering and the wonderfully disturbed Shaye Saint John.

Let me stand next to your fire! Miss Satanica in action.

Nora Keyes displays the seductive charm she honed working the door at the Silverlake Lounge.

For those of you unfamiliar with Nora Keyes, she is the frontwoman for The Centimeters. Hot on the heels of her first solo CD, her unique talent could best be described as an injured bird lost in someone's attic. Her distinctive sound of organ and hauntingly painful vocals was a rare treat and a nice break from the usual hipster artists trying to be the next White Stripes. Surely she'll be dueting with Crispen Glover soon!

Ex-Pixies drummer David Lovering put away his sticks in the hopes of bringing his 'meteor'-magic/audience-experimentation act to the stage (he claims the miraculous rock was sold to him for $10 at a garage sale). Donning a white lab coat and mad scientist hair, he slowed time and broke bulbs with his secret magnetic force. Just when you thought magic acts were for kids, Lovering proved all the audience needed was to be young at heart. Another Pixie, Kim Deal, was there to lend support.

A little after 1:30 a.m. as the crowd worked its way back into the real world, those of us left behind realized the show had only just begun.

Carl Crew joined the fun onstage and gave a warm welcome to the single most unique artist in the world.

Meet Shaye Saint John. Legend has it she was horribly injured in an auto accident which took both her arms and legs, as well as disfiguring her face. She now resembles a mutilated doll with rubber appendages and a wig mask. She's a singer and an actress living with two filmmakers who make dozens of short films about the 'record holder for having the most problems.' Whether she's truly the victim of circumstance or the work of a mad puppeteer, her music and films stand on their own.

When Shaye graced the stage, she was greeted with a mix of applause and uncomfortable silence. One brave fellow even got to shake her rubber hand (I'm so jealous!). The audience didn't seem quite sure how to react (this is the California Institute of Abnormalities, for crissakes!). My one regret is that we were only treated to a very short disjointed tune from CIA's greatest discovery. And like Lenora said: "She's like a hotdog. If it tastes good, who cares what's inside?"

I think the same could be said for the evening as a whole. We wish the best of luck to Lenora and CIA, as they welcome an original show into a city lacking in originality.